Friend #9 & 10 - Sofia and Luigi
The classmate I never knew is now a good friend & he's engaged
Luigi and Sofia are set to marry on September 1, 2026, in the groom’s home country, Malta. I’ve just received the save-the-date.
The two met on the dating app Hinge in spring 2023.
“Do you love Sofia?” I once texted Luigi early in their relationship.
“Yes,” he wrote back.
What’s amusing to me is that Luigi and I never spoke during our university years. He once remembers a quick conversation in passing, but it wasn’t until 52 Friends and our coffee in January 2023 that a friendship began to form. You can read about it here.
At the time, his interest in my project gave me the courage to share it further. Ultimately leading to some modest media coverage.
Today, Luigi, a CPA, does my accounting. As a jeweller, I sourced the diamond and worked on the design for his engagement ring when it was time to propose to Sofia.
The pair are elegant, complementary and a pleasure to have as friends. We’ve been trying to schedule a dinner—actually, we had plans, but Luigi got sick and then gave it to Sofia, so we’re chatting on the phone.
“Did you send Miriam the save-the-date?” Sofia asks Luigi.
“Yes, I got it,” I say.
“We want to see you there,” says Sofia.
They expect to have around 60 people—a mix of close friends and family. The location was chosen for its easy access to European guests. Sofia grew up in Russia but lived in the UK, Switzerland and the Middle East before immigrating to Canada.
“What was your first impression of Luigi?” I ask Sophia.
“I thought, ‘Damn, he’s so shy and closed, and we have such a big cultural gap. I don’t think we’ll get along.’ I am very open and direct, and he weaved around my questions,” she says.
“I gave cautious answers,” Luigi assures us.
“It’s not a job interview; we need to be open. But I like challenges and knew I needed to squeeze this guy as much as possible. As much as he was pushing back, he gave up and shared everything about himself,” says Sofia.
“I was very nervous, Sofia brought the most important questions,” says Luigi.
She avows that Luigi’s behaviour angered her to an extent. “I’m here at the date, ready to put 100 percent into getting to know you, and you’re here giving me 50 percent. But I thought, ‘Let me do it my way,’” says Sofia.
“What did you squeeze out?” says Luigi.
“When I finally squeezed out something real, I thought, ‘Here is an interesting person.’ I want to walk on your grass, swim in your sea and see what you’re like,” says Sofia.
“I did feel like I was standing underneath a waterfall. Sofia was very direct and really wanted to get to know me. It was a little overwhelming but also refreshing. She seemed serious about finding a life partner and was straight to the point,” says Luigi.
The idea of personality tailoring didn’t appeal to Sofia, who wanted to get to know the real Luigi.
“The first date is a big scam, and true things come up later, but if you’re both motivated to find a long-term partner, open your cards. Of course, keep some jokers, but the main thing is open up,” says Sofia.
Luigi explains that he has a lot of respect for Sofia, having come to Canada as an adult and not knowing anyone, yet still putting in effort to meet new people and build new connections.
I’ll write next from their wedding. Stay tuned.
“Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! It is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken.”
– Sonnet 116, William Shakespeare